Tuesday, 12 November 2013

No one Has Supermarket Etiquette, Being a Bad Mother and The "Breast Is Best" Brigade is Out In Force Again

Being a mummy, my favourite time of the week is Saturday.  I enjoy this as I can offload the kids onto my husband whilst I spend quality time to myself.  I make any excuse to go out even if it is for just half an hour and have even taken up the exercise to really escape.

I know what you are thinking, why don't I do this during the week when the children are at school?  This is a fair question but I work part-time and am currently looking for a job which I have realised is a full time job in itself, especially for a "housewife" with no degree who looks on her CV as though she hasn't worked for about 8 years.  I have, as a bloody mother!

But I digress.  One of my joys is to go to the supermarket and listen to the radio/music through headphones whilst I shop.  This ensures that I am completely immersed in my own world whilst I push my (normally broken) trolley.

However, even with headphones in I try to stick to the etiquette rules of Supermarket shopping:

  1. never leave the trolley in the middle of the aisle whilst you go to grab something off a shelf
  2. never put the trolley perpendicular to the aisle completely blocking it
  3. always be as quick as possible when you look for something in a spot so as not to prevent others getting to the same place
  4. say "excuse me" politely if someone is in the way
  5. After "saying "excuse me" three times just go past and slightly budge the trolley to make it clear you are pissed off they didn't move out of the bloody way after I was so f***ing polite
It is points 4 and 5 which caused me immense indignation.  

At the supermarket, and I appreciate on a Saturday it is busy, I was in a narrow aisle and a couple with their child in the trolley were blocking the way whilst looking at cards.

After saying "excuse me please" three times I decided to go past and slightly nudged the trolley.  The woman tutted me and said loudly I was "extremely rude".  Seeing a shade slightly less than red I pointed out that despite asking her three times to move her precious cargo she ignored me and that infact she and her husband were the rude ones.  I then put my earphones back in and triumphantly walked away.

So if you see a woman wearing earphones saying "excuse me" a lot, please move as I don't want to belittle you as well!

Today has been an emotionally exhausting day with the morning school rush consisting of me being a horrible shouting banshee of a mother followed by the revelation in the news that if you breast feed, you will be given vouchers for Poundland, Asda, or John Lewis.

First thing this morning my eldest managed to push all my buttons when it came to winding me up and by the time I dropped him off at school he looked thoroughly forlorn and tearful whilst I begged him for a kiss.  Of course I didn't get one and we both parted ways heavy footed and sad.  Great, now I can spend the rest of the day berating myself for being the worst mother in the world.  Sheesh!

To top it all off, the "Breast Is Best" article this morning completely wound me up.

I cannot believe that the government or Big Brother as I now like to call them, has decided to give incentives to new mothers with "prizes" for breast feeding.  The longer you do the more money you get.  Double Sheesh!!

It's bad enough that in the hospital your breast is pulled and prodded into place by nurses and midwives the moment your new baby is born but now they are trying to bribe you with money as well.

Unfortunately I couldn't breast feed my first child and could only breast feed my second for a couple of weeks due to illness.

Ontop of that I will never forget another new mother asking me "if I felt bad for not breast feeding".

Might I suggest that instead of giving incentives for breast feeding, Big Brother should perhaps offer another incentive for trying to be the best parent you can with better education, excellent healthcare and more outdoor facilities for children.

Rant over!